Brothers In Arms
by The Postmodern Prometheus
Summary: Malcolm and Reese both have a crush on the same girl. Reese wins the resulting fight, but who will win her heart?


A/N: All lyrics quoted are from the song 'Brothers In Arms' by Dire Straits.  
  
  
  
'These mist covered mountains  
  
Are a home now for me  
  
But my home is the lowlands  
  
And always will be'  
  
  
  
It was with a sombre air that Malcolm and Reese dragged themselves out of bed early on Saturday morning. They looked at each other bleary-eyed for a moment before staggering in the general direction of the bathroom, still half asleep. Ordinarily Saturday would be their favourite day of the week - watching TV all morning, nothing but lazing around all day, with the occasional break to torture their younger brother Dewey - that was how they usually spent their weekends. On this particular Saturday however, things were very different. Their high school was holding its annual charity fair, and attendance was compulsory for all students. They were even taking a register both at the beginning and the finish of the event to ensure that nobody ditched it, as Malcolm and Reese would surely have done otherwise. Even worse, the boys had been 'volunteered' by Lois to help out with the running of the fair, so they would be spending the day manning a stall selling second-hand toys and dusty old games which nobody wanted any more, but which they were expected to sell to raise money for charity. They weren't happy.  
  
As Reese pushed open the bathroom door he saw that Dewey was already in there cleaning his teeth. Dewey turned and looked at him as he entered, regarding his brother with contempt. He emphatically spat out the toothpaste he had in his mouth into the sink, still glaring at Reese.  
  
'What's your problem?' said Reese irritably, as he grabbed his own toothbrush.  
  
'Why do I have to get dragged to your stupid charity thing today?' asked Dewey angrily, 'I'm not even at your school. Just think of all the cartoons I could be watching. I shan't forget this.' He added menacingly.  
  
'Oh and you think we want to go?' said Malcolm, who had also by now entered the bathroom. 'We're getting dragged there as well. Believe me if it we're up to us this is the last thing we'd want to be doing. But Mom says we have to go, so we have to go. It's as simple as that.' As far as the boys were concerned, Lois's decision was final. She never ever changed her mind, no matter how convincing or overwhelming the argument against her might be. If you were going to cross Lois, you'd better pray that you didn't get caught, or face the consequences.  
  
'Well Mom's not being fair,' said Dewey glumly.  
  
'Duh!' replied Reese, 'when has she ever been fair?' He finished cleaning his teeth and returned to the bedroom to get dressed, leaving Malcolm and Dewey alone in the bathroom.  
  
'If you wanted a Mom that's fair Dewey,' said Malcolm bitterly, 'you should try another family, because you're not likely to ever find one here.'  
  
The boys finished up in the bathroom and got dressed, Dewey deliberately wearing his bright red shirt which he knew Lois hated in protest at having to go to the fair. Thirty minutes later the whole family was assembled in the living room, lined up like criminals in an identity parade. It was time for Lois to give them 'the talk.' Even Hal looked positively terrified, having experienced Lois's wrath more times than he'd care to remember.  
  
'Now you boys had better behave today or else,' she began, glaring at them each in turn, 'and that means Dewey - no candy whatsoever, do I make myself clear? If I find you've gotten into a single fight today then you'll be grounded for the rest of the school year.' Dewey nodded forlornly.  
  
'And you two,' continued Lois, turning to Malcolm and Reese, 'you are going to stay at that stall the entire day, do you understand? That means no fighting, no sneaking off to see your friends. You're there to do good for charity, not to cause mayhem. Oh so help me if you let me down again.'  
  
'What if we have to go to the bathroom?' asked Reese.  
  
'One of you at a time may leave to go to the bathroom, but that's the only reason. And make sure you hurry back, because I'll be checking on you regularly' she said threateningly.  
  
'Any other questions?' she asked. 'No? Well let's get going then. Damnit this is going to be a fun and enjoyable day, and if any one of you does a single thing to spoil it then you'll really get see me mad, and believe me it's not a pretty sight. That includes you Hal!'  
  
For Malcolm and Reese it was one of the most boring days of their lives. Practically nobody came to their stall, and to make matters worse it was swelteringly hot outside, so before long they were both sweating and uncomfortable. Hot, tired and dirty, by the time the fair was coming to a close they were both eager to leave, that was until they spotted the girl. She was walking over on the far side of the field. Malcolm saw her first, and for the next few minutes all he did was stare at her, as if she were some celestial vision come to rescue him from his torment.  
  
'What on earth are you staring at?' said Reese eventually, in an irritated voice. 'What could possibly be so interesting in this God-awful place that you could gaze at it for 5 minutes straight - I counted,' he added, showing Malcolm his watch. There was no response.  
  
'Hey doofus,' called out Reese. There was still no response. 'Come back to me Malcolm,' he said, snapping his fingers under Malcolm's nose.  
  
'That girl is incredible,' said Malcolm dreamily, the vacant look not leaving his eyes, still staring. 'I mean, she's perfect, the way her hair swirls in the breeze, the way she walks - it's as if she owns the entire field and we're just privileged to be allowed to share it with her. She's like an angel.'  
  
Reese groaned. 'Oh not another one. I've heard this all before - "the spectral glow, the aura of perfection, the magical feeling" - give me a break! If I had a nickel for every time you did this, well let's just say I wouldn't be working in a charity stall. She's not worth it Malcolm, she's just like every other girl - she'll pretend you've got a chance with her and then bang, she'll break your heart and smear it all over your life, believe me, I know.'  
  
Malcolm finally turned away from the girl and looked back at Reese, who was smirking. 'Look at her,' he said.  
  
'What?' replied Reese, 'Why?'  
  
'Just look at her,' said Malcolm again, 'she's over there by the ring-toss game.'  
  
'Fine,' said Reese reluctantly, turning to look in the general direction of the ring-toss game, 'although there's really no... Wow!' Now it was Reese's turn to stare.  
  
Eventually Malcolm spoke. 'Uh, Reese? Come back to me Reese' he said, tapping his brother on the shoulder. Reese eventually snapped out of his trance.  
  
'You know that "magical feeling" you're always talking about?' Reese said.  
  
'Yeah,' replied Malcolm.  
  
'Does it feel like an emptiness in the pit of your stomach, like someone just sucked out your insides and now you're hollow, but in a good way?'  
  
'Yeah,' said Malcolm again.  
  
For a while there was silence. The girl continued to make her way around the fair, pausing at various stalls on the way, until eventually she was only a short distance away from where Malcolm and Reese were sitting.  
  
'Oh my God!' hissed Reese, 'she's coming this way!'  
  
'I know,' Malcolm hissed back at him, 'what do we do?'  
  
'I don't know,' said Reese in a panicky voice, 'I don't know!'  
  
Now the girl was at the next stall. She turned in the direction of Reese and Malcolm and began walking towards them. She smiled.  
  
'Say something,' whispered Reese.  
  
'You say something,' whispered Malcolm back.  
  
'Hi guys,' said the girl breezily, approaching the stall.  
  
'Hello,' squeaked Malcolm and Reese in unison.  
  
'You know it's really good of you to give up your Saturday to help out a charity like this,' continued to girl.  
  
'Well I was happy to help,' said Malcolm smiling.  
  
'So was I,' added Reese quickly, glaring at him, 'anything I can do to make the world a better place is worthy of my time.' Now he smiled at the girl.  
  
'Aren't you two quite the pair of good Samaritans,' said the girl. 'By the way, my name's Dana.'  
  
'I'm Reese.'  
  
'Malcolm.'  
  
'Good to meet you. I just moved here from Michigan, my family wanted to get away from the cold, so anyway I'm starting school here on Monday, I guess I'll see you guys there.'  
  
'If you like,' said Malcolm, trying to get his foot in the door before Reese had the chance to say anything, 'I could show you round on Monday, so you know where everything is - it can be pretty daunting starting a new school, not knowing anyone.'  
  
'I can help,' added Reese quickly. Malcolm glared at him.  
  
'Oh you guys are so sweet,' said Dana, beaming at them, 'but I'm sure I'll be fine - I've already looked round the school so I know pretty much where everything is, but thanks for the offer. I'll see you round.' With that she turned and moved on towards the next stall, leaving Malcolm and Reese in a state of shock, still replaying the conversation with her over in their minds to try and work out if they'd made a good impression or not.  
  
'You jerk!' said Malcolm, turning to Reese with an angry look on his face, '"I can help" - what the hell is that supposed to mean?'  
  
'I hate to break it to you Malcolm,' said Reese in a knowing voice, 'but she was smiling at me. I think I might ask her out some time.'  
  
'She was smiling at me moron!' said Malcolm loudly, 'and I saw her first, I'm gonna ask her out, and you'd better leave her alone, I don't want you upsetting her.'  
  
'And what the hell is that supposed to mean? I can talk to girls without making them cry. At least I won't bore her to death.'  
  
'Oh go write some poetry, because that's about as near as you're likely to get to having any success with her - in your dreams!'  
  
'You want me to kick your ass?'  
  
'Surprise, surprise we've resorted to violence already. There's no need to take it out on me just because girls can't stand you.'  
  
'You two make me sick,' said another voice, it was Dewey. Unnoticed to Malcolm and Reese in the heat of their argument he had sneaked up behind them and was listening to them fight. 'As if a girl like her would ever want to go out with either of you two dorks, don't make me laugh. Sometimes I think I'm the only sane member of this family,' he said sadly.  
  
'All right then,' said Reese animatedly, 'we'll see which one of us she goes for, may the better man win.' He held out his hand for Malcolm to shake.  
  
'You're on,' replied Malcolm, grasping his hand. For a moment they squeezed as hard as they could, and they both went very red in the face before their hands finally broke apart. They each rubbed them painfully.  
  
'When will they learn?' said Dewey in amusement, shaking his head. 


End file.
